Van der Kolk, B. (2014)

Van der Kolk, B. (2014). ''The body keeps the score. Mind, brain and body in the transformation of trauma''. Viking Press.

(17) “We learned from these Rorschach tests that traumatized people have a tendency to superimpose their trauma on everything around them and have trouble deciphering whatever is going on around them. There appeared to be little in between. We also learned that trauma affects the imagination.” (17) “Imagination is absolutely critical to the quality of our lives. … Without imagination there is no hope, no chance to envision a better future, no place to go, no goal to reach.” (108) “… we saw that … the children who had not been abused still trusted in an essentially benign universe; they could imagine ways out of bad situations. They seemed to feel safe and protected within their own families.” (115) “The need for attachment never lessens. Most human beings simply cannot tolerate being disengaged from others from any length of time. People who cannot connect through work, friendships, or family usually find other ways of bonding, as through illnesses, lawsuits, or family feuds. Anything is preferable to that godforsaken sense of irrelevance and alienation.” (217) “In order to return to proper functioning, [the] persistent emergency response [by those traumatized] must come to an end. The body needs to be restored to a baseline state of safety and relaxation from which it can mobilize and take action in response to real danger.” (218) Once patients can tolerate being aware of their trauma-based physical experiences, they are, likely to discover powerful physical impulses – like hitting, pushing or running - that were aroused during the trauma but were suppressed in order to survive.” (218) “Feeling the pleasure of taking effective action restores a sense of agency and a sense of being able to actively defend and protect themselves.” (296) “It is one thing to process memories from trauma, but it is an entirely different matter to confront the inner void – the holes in the soul that result from not having been wanted, not having been seen, and not having been allowed to speak the truth.” (308) “… the possibility of forming virtual memories that live side by side with the painful realities of the past and provide sensory experiences of feeling seen, cradled, and supported that can serve as antidotes to memories of hurt and betrayal.” (341) “We need to teach them [traumatized children] how to be interdependent, which means teaching them how to have relationships.” (341) “Over time, collaboration helps the ids become important people in one another’s lives.” (351) “People who feel safe and meaningfully connected with others have little reason to squander their lives doing drugs or staring numbly at television; they don’t feel compelled to stuff themselves with carbohydrates or assault their fellow human beings. However, if nothing they do seems to make a difference, they feel trapped and become susceptible to the lure of pills, gang leaders, extremist religions, or violent political movements – anybody and anything that promises relief.” (351) “As the ACE study has shown, child abuse and neglect is the single most preventable cause of mental illnesses, the single most common cause of drug and alcohol abuse, and a significant contributor to leading causes of death such as diabetes, heart disease, cancer, stroke, and suicide.” (352) “More than anything else, being able to feel safe with other people defines mental health, safe connections are fundamental to meaningful and satisfying lives. The critical challenge in a classroom setting is to foster reciprocity: truly hearing and being heard; really seeing and being seen by other people.” (355) “Resilience is the product of agency: knowing that what you do can make a difference.”